Abandonment Issues Versus Agoraphobia ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model Blog (‘ANTM’ Cycle 16)

Only days earlier, I debated if I was even going to watch the finale of this season’s ‘Top Model’.  The girl that I thought would win won (I was tipped off by a Wikipedia article weeks before the finale).  It’s a long explanation, but suffice to say that I played hooky from not only one social obligation (which will be the reason you will not find this entry on my Facebook) but two.  Not merely was I a party pooper but my friend, whom I refer to in this blog as Miss Cindy, also decided that it would be more fun to go eat Mexican food (Kansas City has some excellent Mexican restaurants) and then go to her house and watch the show.  You have to understand that there is a method that we have developed.  We love to make jewelry and watch crappy TV together.  It’s relaxing, plus we get to laugh and be creative.  Thus I set the scene for the evening.

 

                I don’t want to blame the margaritas, but allow me to take the time to mention that Miss Cindy wanted me to view a new Paris Hilton reality show where she is looking for a new BFF in Dubai.  I didn’t want to watch it, honestly.  I was happy watching the PBS show about Pharaoh Psusennes I, but Miss Cindy was determined that I look at the other show even though when she asked, “Do you want to travel to Egypt?” I replied with a passionate affirmative and she had to reboot her TV three times because her On Demand service wasn’t working.  Therefore for this article I have two programs to chat about.

 

                First, ‘Top Model’; Brittani won!  I think most of it had to do with how Molly came off in interviews.  Unlike in early seasons, the last two cycles at least, feature the final two in head to head competition for the length of the show.  First there is the Covergirl commercial, which apparently the company has decided to change up their look from being the ‘All America Girl Next Door’ type to the ‘It Girl’ with an edge.  Both of the contestants did fine during their commercial shoots; no tears or breakdowns.  After that they were photographed for their Covergirl ad.  I have to say that Molly’s photo was one of the most striking I have seen.  The way her hair was styled was perfection.  Miss Cindy and I noted that she has the sort of face that doesn’t look that impressive without makeup, but with the right cosmetics she could launch a thousand ships. 

 

                I didn’t like Brittani’s Covergirl photo as well as Molly’s.  She looked like a poor man’s Louise Brooks although Tyra was falling all over herself over it.  She also looked as if she was afraid.  I admit that not only didn’t I get it, I don’t think I would be interested in a product with that sort of advertising.    

 

                Then there was the fashion show. They remained in Morocco and walked in a Vivienne Westwood show whose clothes honestly don’t inspire much excitement for me – she focuses on punk and new wave clothing.  Brittani had the stronger walk, although Molly was able to keep a straight face when they became entangled with one another while posing.  Molly also managed not to fall down as women threw rose peddles at the models from above.  BTW, when I suggest that Brittani fell down, it sounds fairly minor, but she slammed first into a wall and then went down.  She cowboyed up and made the final walk, but did so in great pain. 

 

 

 

                Now for the cream, earlier in the show Molly parents surprised her and gave her all sorts of warmth and overall good vibes.  The introduction of the families started last cycle and I think that it is one of the smarter innovations.  For weeks now Molly has talked about her abandonment issues and how her adoptive parents really went through hell with her when she was transitioning into those terrible teen years.  At one point she had to go to a rehab.  Both Miss Cindy and I thought that Molly actually looked like her adoptive parents and that both of them were so cute that you wanted to wrap them up and put them in your carry on luggage.  Her mother talked about how Molly was angry about her situation, but that she always had confidence.  The parents managed to make Molly more likeable.

 

 

                On the other side of the coin, Brittani’s mother wasn’t there.  Miss Cindy made a point of observing that nothing has ever been mentioned about Brittani’s father which I thought was interesting – usually ‘Top Model’ manages to exploit ever sad and inspirational aspect of a contestant’s life.  We all know that she comes from a trailer court because she talks about how amazing it is for someone of her lowly status (those are the feelings I think she is trying to portray, although those aren’t her words) to be on a show where there is an opportunity for her to live out her dream.  Within the last few weeks she has started to talk about her mother’s agoraphobia which is the fear of leaving your home.  Honestly, I don’t know if I bought all of that ‘my mother just had back surgery.’  It seems a bit contrived knowing her mother’s history.  However if you have just an ounce of empathy you too would have felt for Brittani after she met with Molly’s folks and realized that no such reunion was in her immediate future.  She was able to talk to her mother via Skype.  Of course Miss Cindy and I have to ruin the mood by cracking funny about how Brittani’s mother indulged her phobias more than she loved her daughter.  I know that sounds harsh, but in many ways it is true in terms of folks (myself included) who let our fears direct our lives rather than our love for people and things we want to do.                    

 

                 The ‘Top Model’ twist that was talked about in previews of the show was that the girls both got much shorter haircuts.  Brittani’s haircut was ADORABLE and this is coming from someone who hates short hair.  Molly’s do was meh.  It was the sort of look that was okay on some occasions but nowhere near as versatile as her longer hair thus proving my theory that I jokingly talked about in the previous blog, all things being equal, the girl with the worst hair is sent home. 

 

                I don’t think I revealed that Ann Ward returned to the show.  She was in the final fashion show.  I know that my blog from last cycle ended on a positive note about her, but I still don’t know about her.  She seemed so awkward on the makeshift runway. 

 

                My final two cents about ‘America’s Next Top Model’ was that after Brittani won Miss Cindy Lou Who cried a little.  We had one of those exchanges which went like this…

 

               “Are you crying?”

 

               “Yes.”

 

               “You’re crying over Brittani winning ‘America’s Next Top Model’?”

 

                “It’s so moving.” 

 

                Yuppers, everything would be all candy canes and unicorn smiles if Miss Cindy didn’t then connive to have me watch part of an episode of the Paris Hilton show.  I’ll save you the general setup because there isn’t much that happens besides shopping.  Overall I thought that it was a show that was produced for foreign markets and not the TB (typo and it stays) Guide Network.  I have to inquiry if the Hilton family are in need of funds because both Paris’ father and herself are the producers. 

 

         Here’s how tacky this thing is, during the contestant interviews they sit in front of a cloth wall that needs ironing as if the producers had just jogged to the nearest market and picked up the cheapest shiniest material they could find and stapled it to a board and called it a day.  The program is like a marriage between all that is embarrassing about ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ and a shopping channel.  Throughout most of the show Hilton sits on a gilt throne while issuing edits in her breathy voice.  I imagined that this version of Hilton’s BFF was made to be distributed more to foreign markets than American.  However, I found the Wikipedia article about it very interesting.  I would write more but the muse escapes me.  I suppose it is a symptom of the ephemera that is Paris Hilton.

 

           Well, I left this article in a bit of a muddle.  In summary, I had less fun writing this cycle’s blog then I did Cycle 15.  At the moment I’m on the fence about if I will do a blog for Cycle 17.  God knows that I don’t think I’ll be doing any blogs for ‘Project Runway’ since I have no idea when it will return.  Congratulations Brittani, I hope you set the modeling world on fire…however if you are a typical ‘ANTM’ winner I hope your experience on various reality programs goes well.

 

                     For more info be sure to check out the official website for ‘ANTM’.  Here is a list of my blog entries for cycle 16 thus far.

 

 

‘America’s Next Top Model’ Turns Sweet Sixteen ~ ‘ANTM’ Cycle 16 Blog

Psychotherapy and Stick Figures ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 (ANTM) Blog

Makeovers and Busted Up Weaves ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 (ANTM) Blog

Setting Models on Fire While They Strut Down the Runway ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 Blog (ANTM)

Faux Furs and Rachel Zoe ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 Blog (ANTM)

Discontent and the Rolling of the Eyes ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 Blog (ANTM)

Breakdowns and Breast Cancer Awareness ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Cycle 16 Blog (‘ANTM’) 

Landfill Modeling Made Easy ~ ‘America’s Next Top Model’ Blog Cycle 16 (‘ANTM’)

Modeling in Morocco ~ America’s Next Top Model Blog (ANTM Cycle 16)

 

 

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